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(This song was always a little improvised, so the lyrics are an approximation!)


Met her in a club on Monday, and I knew I was in
Cos we went out on Tuesday, and she slipped something into my drink
Woke up on Thursday, And something felt wrong
What happened to Wednesday?
What The Hell Happened On Wednesday?!

I spent the weekend just chillin'.
- Crying
No I was definitely chilling
I was just relaxing in my penthouse suite, top floor!
Alright it's a room in my mum's house
But you know what? She don't come in
Cos I'm 35 now
And I make the rules.... Bitch?

Tried to call her on Monday, the phone line was dead,
When I woke up on Tuesday, She was there in my bed,
Woke up on Thursday, What happened to Wednesday!?

I was naked in her flat, — WTHHOW?!
I was shaving the neighbour's cat, — WTHHOW?!
And I think the cat was dead, — WTHHOW?!
'Cos I'd bitten off it's head. — WTHHOW?!

I spent the weekend just chillin'.
- Crying
This time I was definitely chilling
I was in the hot tub, with the guys
... I mean with the girls
- Crying like a baby
I was not crying at all
- Mmm, in a puddle of his own wee
Sometimes when I'm just so relaxed, I let it all flow out
Make my own jacuzzi
The ladies love it
OK, turns out the ladies don't love it
Ain't that right, R Kelly

Laydeez are like snowflakes
They're beautiful and unique
But also like snowflakes, they quickly vanish if you piss on them

Felt ill on Monday, so I went for a nap
When I woke up it was Thursday, holy crap!

I was driving when I awoke, — WTHHOW?!
I can't drive and I was high on coke, — WTHHOW?!
She was dead in the backseat, — WTHHOW?!
She had a mouth full of catmeat, — WTHHOW?!
*I was wearing her makeup and clothes, — WTHHOW?!
I had a cock-ring up my nose, — WTHHOW?!
I was wearing her skin as a shawl, — WTHHOW?!
The other guy was wearing nothing at all, — WTHHOW?!
I pulled up the car and I phoned my mum, saying: — WTHHOW?!
And a phone in the back seat rung.

And I chilled on Sunday.